Love Letters to Luna Lovegood
by n1h1l4dr3m
Summary: Rolf begins a correspondence with Luna Lovegood and romance ensues.
1. Regarding Your Article

Dear Sir or Ma'am,

I am writing in response to last month's magizoology article in The Quibbler. I am a magizoologist and my studies have recently taken me to Sweden. The article was discussing the potential hazards of the Crumple-horned Snorkack. I have included several pictures of a specimen that I believe may be of interest to you. Your article detailed the explosive nature of the horn, stating that even the slightest bit of magical energy was likely to cause an unwanted blast, the radius of which could level an entire house. For that reason, I am keeping the horn in a state of magical stasis. I would be most appreciative of any guidance you might be able to offer,

Most humbly,

Rolf Scamander


	2. An Invitation

Dear Miss Lovegood,

Your reply was most informative. May I offer my sincerest condolences regarding the destruction of your house. I had wrongfully assumed that your description in the article of horn's explosion was not literal, and that you were using "an entire house" as a reference point for the wizard who might be only dabbling in magizoology.

I apologize for the blurry quality of the photographs; I'm afraid the stasis spells I cast interfered with the film.

I would be most honored if you would come visit. The coordinates for apparation are: 61.3167° N, 14.8333° E. Please give me a date and time and I will gladly await your arrival. If you need help filling out the international apparation application, please do not hesitate to ask. I've traveled around the world repeatedly due to my employment at the Beast Division of the Ministry of Magic.

Most humbly,

Rolf Scamander


	3. Education

Dear Miss Lovegood,

I believe that writing "see employment status" is sufficient for Block 42B-C. Although, if you put "traveling for personal reasons" instead of "business" you will have to elaborate in Block 43. The trials of beauracracy!

Included is a small sampling of venom from the billyfarks. Add a little—a LITTLE!- to your tea. It produces the most soothing effect!

To answer your question, yes, my grandfather is Newt Scamander. I'm gratified to learn that you enjoyed his books in your years studying at Hogwarts. I did, as well, although I must admit that all the professors held me to a higher standard than the rest of my house, what with Grandfather being a former headmaster and all. In which house did the sorting hat decide to place you? If I were to hazard a guess, based upon our lively corrospondance, I would say most definitely Ravenclaw. Or else, I suppose, Hufflepuff. I've noticed a great deal of Hufflepuffs persue magizoology. Your keen wit would suggest otherwise though.

Looking forward to your next reply and travel dates,

Rolf Scamander


	4. Anticipation

Dear Miss Luna,

Wherever did you find a Wrinkled Witwizkie? This is by far the most perfect shell I've ever seen! It is text-book perfect! Thank you for this very generous gift!

I can set up a port-key if you'd prefer, instead of international apparation. I've verified your application with the regional Ministry of Magic Office, and they said it is approved. Just waiting on your chosen date of arrival—I'll be there to meet you.

Eagerly awaiting your arrival,

Rolf


	5. Sweden's Magizoology and Wildlife

Dear Miss Luna,

I hope you do not think it too forward of me, leaving a note in your room. I felt that, as your host and tour guide of Sweden, it would be remiss of me to not do a perimeter sweep for Knargles and Rolipools. The Rolipools are a newly discovered creature, and highly dangerous. They're attracted to anything with a magical signature and have been known to burrow in to the ears of sleeping wizards! The local hospital had a serious infestation, resulting in temporary deafness of three patients! Can you imagine the horror of waking up and finding a Rolipool in your ear!?

I don't mean to worry you—I did a sweep and cast several warding charms. I have no doubt that you will be safe here. It would take something more like an Ironbelly Dragon to break through these wards. A Rolipool stands no chance!

In any event, I hope you enjoyed your evening touring Sweden, and the wildlife here. If you would be so kind as to join me for breakfast, I will meet you in the hotel lobby at 8 o'clock sharp.

Warmest regards,

Rolf


	6. Dinner in London

Dear Miss Luna,

I have not had such an enjoyable weekend in very long time. I hope you enjoyed Sweden, and do look forward to your return visit. Or, perhaps we could visit the little wizarding country of Burkina Faso in Africa and hunt the fearsome Mome Raths! That is truly one of my favorite things about being a magizoologist: I enjoy traveling the world. I suspect that you, as a world renowned journalist, have probably done more travelling than I have, though.

I will be making my bimonthly report to the Ministry of Magic next week. Would you do me the honor of joining me for dinner? I should be in London proper around the 3rd through the 7th, and my clerical duties and reports will all be concluded by 3 in the afternoon.

Looking forward to your owl,

Rolf


	7. Job Offer

Dear Luna,

I'm still at the Ministry—don't worry, I won't be late for our dinner (If the weather holds I was hoping we could take a picnic to the beach. Perhaps we might spot a Primrose Benzoate!) I'm writing because my boss, Dr. Augustus Creare, just told me that a position for another magizoologist has opened up in the Beast Division.

Most applicants are all Dragonists, and we have neither the funding nor the interest to focus on such a narrow field. We leave that business to the Dragon Reserves. Anyway, I did mention your name to him. I know that you are happy with your employment at The Quibbler (time spent with family is so important. Only those of us who were so affected by the Great Wizarding War can ever really understand this), however, the position is still open for applicants. If you would like, I can bring the forms to dinner.

See you soon,

Rolf


	8. Team Assignment

Dear Luna,

Dr. Creare said that he is routing your application for approval! I'm so excited! I can't believe this good fortune! He did say that you may pick whoever you wish to work with during the indoctrination and training period.

If I may be so bold—I would consider it a privilege to work with you.

I'll see you tomorrow, I hope, at the Ministry. My next assignment is either to Papua New Guinea to track the migration patterns of the Slithy Toves, or to Siberia to measure the magical signatures of the Geisels. Both sound delightful; I've never been as far north as Siberia, though.

Most excited to welcome you to Beast Division,

Rolf


	9. Crisis

Dear Luna,

If you wake up before I get back,

DON'T PANIC! YOU'RE OKAY, AND I'M BRINGING HELP!

I'll be back with medical supplies in a jiffy (did you know that a jiffy is an actual unit of measurement that the muggles use? It's 33 picoseconds long. Of course you know that. I'm sorry, I ramble when I'm nervous, you know this!) Based off the information we read last night, the sting of the Quibblydink should only have temporarily knocked you out, a kind of four- or five-second stunning. You're so much smaller than the only other person I have heard of who got stung, so maybe that's why you're still passed out. Either way, I'm afraid that you got hurt when you fell out of the tree. Your leg looks broken. Okay I'm leaving and I'll be back—in a jiffy.

Rolf


	10. Not snoring!

Dear Luna,

You were still asleep—I could tell by the cute noises that you insist aren't snores that are coming from your tent. I'm just going to go for a short walk along the riverbank, and maybe enjoy the sunrise. If you wake up before I'm back, come find me. As I write this letter I'm filled with a profound sadness that we will have to leave the Amazon Basin and return to England. I am going to Dr. Creare about sending us back for another month or so. What do you think?

I hope you're dreaming sweet dreams,

Rolf


End file.
